Monday, October 27, 2008

She Laughed

It was too pretty a day to be sad
So she tied a red ribbon in her hair

and she laughed

Even though the walls kept shrinking
and the roof kept crumbling

She laughed

Even as the cold rain fell
and as the darkness grew

She laughed

Even as the world began to fade
and the snow began to fall

And then
When the last one was gone
She turned
put the chairs on the tables
Locked the doors
and sat down to cry

But she could not remember how to...

Him and Her - I

He walks straight to his room,
head slightly bowed.
Eyes on the floor.
No one is home.
But just in case...

Locking the door behind him
he sits on the floor
and sighs

Looking down at his once white school uniform
he decides
changing would be a good idea
He learned a long time ago
Blood on his clothes freaked his mother out
Even his father
when he himself wasn't the reason.

She walks into the house cautiously
announces her arrival
Is puzzled when no one replies
Then remembers they went out to see a movie
Telling them about her grades could wait
Die another day starts playing in her head and she bangs her head against the wall to drive it out.
Stupid pop culture addict neighbors!

She gets grounded for a week
It doesn't really bother her
Her friends were getting annoying anyway
Lying on the floor on her back
she watches shadows dancing on the ceiling
and smiles
This was meant to be punishment?

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Reasonably Content

Waking up early
New clothes
Getting to class in time
Being hauled up in class and answering the question put to you
Being asked to prepare a case analysis for no reason at all
Being yelled at by a professor and threatened with the "strictest disciplinary action"
One normal conversation with a professor who you were certain was going to kill you
Smoking with a few friends
Getting to the shop just as it is closing
Getting out of a sweater
Chips and orange juice
The internet

A reasonably content I...

Wednesday, October 15, 2008


Monday, October 13, 2008

Last to Know


I flunked land-law. That means I'm definitely failing history. Consti was always a sure thing.

Three repeats once again!


These hols have not been nearly as long as they should have been. I don't wanna go back. Its not that I hate Law school. I just don't want to spend more time there. Then again, I don't have any other place to go. No wait. That has to be rephrased. I don't have any other place I want to go. Not anyplace define-able anyhow.

Dad left for some place today morning. He'll be back only after I've left, so I said goodbye. He said I had been "good" these hols. Whatever that means. But yeah, I do kinda get it. I have been 'good' these hols.

Spent lot of time at home. Gave the dog a bath. Filled water. Spent an entire day at the mall with my parents. There were really very few loud arguments. Ran errands (without much complaining). Didn't go out to meet 'friends' too often. Played cards almost every night with the family. Pretended to study.... You get the picture...

But what bugs me is, for some strange reason, I did all of it with a vague sense of finality. Like I was sure I wouldn't have this chance again. I dunno why... It doesn't exactly scare me or upset me. Just feels like its a fact half of me always knew and the other half quietly accepted. It's like I was just building memories. You know, 'perfect' happy moments mom n dad can always look back on. Hell, I think I'm also doing it for me. And I guess that means that a decision has been made again...
and once more, I am the last to know...

Monday, October 6, 2008

"Leave Me Alone"

Always a Dream