"khan, priya, gk, sarojni: wt better place in the world"
That would be the status message of one of my classmates. The answer is easy, "Pecos, Palace Grounds, Blossoms, Noon Wines: That place".
It's strange how much I miss Bangalore. But I don't really know if it's the city that I miss or the amazing freedom I have there. If I was there right now... I could have been in town, or at least smoking at gate 1. Even if I was in my hostel, I could have been heading up to my terrace for a cigarette and a nice long phone conversation.
Instead, here I am, counting days. I need to keep myself distracted. I need to find something to do. If I don't, I'm going to go insane. I need to 'feed my head'.
Anyway, the plan for tomorrow involves leaving home early(ish) in the morning and going for a nice long walk. I could smoke somewhere on the way... hopefully. I'll carry enough cash for an auto just in case I lose my way, though I do realize if that were to happen, I would just end up wandering around till I found my way back.
I just hope it all works out. Otherwise, I'll have to move on to Plan B. Damn it.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Home
I'm sitting at home, on 'my' bed. My dog is wrapped up in two blankets and is sleeping with her head in my lap. This is what I missed.
So, the holidays have begun. I don't think anything has changed. It was the same story as it always is. I don't even know why I expect things to change...
Anyway, I just had an entire tub of Strawberry Ice Cream. That felt good. And it really isn't all that cold here. I mean, it isn't nearly as cold as I thought it would be.
It feels really weird though. Being at home. This isn't home. This has been the place I go to in my holidays. For 19 years now. How am I ever supposed to see this as home? Scarily enough, Bangalore is more home than this place will ever be. But I don't really mind. No wait, I don't really care!
Anyway, I shall go now. Am watching Achmed videos on youtube. Haha!
So, the holidays have begun. I don't think anything has changed. It was the same story as it always is. I don't even know why I expect things to change...
Anyway, I just had an entire tub of Strawberry Ice Cream. That felt good. And it really isn't all that cold here. I mean, it isn't nearly as cold as I thought it would be.
It feels really weird though. Being at home. This isn't home. This has been the place I go to in my holidays. For 19 years now. How am I ever supposed to see this as home? Scarily enough, Bangalore is more home than this place will ever be. But I don't really mind. No wait, I don't really care!
Anyway, I shall go now. Am watching Achmed videos on youtube. Haha!
Utterly pointless
I haven't eaten anything since breakfast yesterday, It's almost 2.30 and my cab is supposed to be here at 3, I haven't finished packing, and I don't have locks for my bag nor any money.
Heh, and here I am. Smoking the last cigarette for a long while.
*sigh*
-_-
I should go.
Heh, and here I am. Smoking the last cigarette for a long while.
*sigh*
-_-
I should go.
Friday, January 16, 2009
An Experiment in November Rain
0342
Let's record one. I love these experiment-like things!! Am listening to 'The Perfect Drug'. hehe. Appropriate?
0358
That would be almost 20 minutes, yeah? Good enough. Track now playing is 'Road Tripping'... Brings back memories... Kay, enough reminiscing!!! Let's make a scene. *laughs*
0426
Wow, that took longer than it should have!
So, the holidays are here. Again. It seems like this trimester just began, but then when I think back, it's been so long! Not in sense of time, but of memories. Well, that sounds gay(not that there's anything wrong with that). What I mean is, it's been a long trimester in term of events. The repeats, Admit One, Strawberry Fields, Rubix, Christmas, New Year's eve, Attendance shortage, etc. You get what I mean!
November Rain. Why would you want it to stop?
I just wish November Rain would keep falling...
Let's record one. I love these experiment-like things!! Am listening to 'The Perfect Drug'. hehe. Appropriate?
0358
That would be almost 20 minutes, yeah? Good enough. Track now playing is 'Road Tripping'... Brings back memories... Kay, enough reminiscing!!! Let's make a scene. *laughs*
0426
Wow, that took longer than it should have!
So, the holidays are here. Again. It seems like this trimester just began, but then when I think back, it's been so long! Not in sense of time, but of memories. Well, that sounds gay(not that there's anything wrong with that). What I mean is, it's been a long trimester in term of events. The repeats, Admit One, Strawberry Fields, Rubix, Christmas, New Year's eve, Attendance shortage, etc. You get what I mean!
November Rain. Why would you want it to stop?
I just wish November Rain would keep falling...
Memories?
Believe me, I know...
I know what it's like when you talk about memories in that rare happy voice and have silence on the other end from your partner in crime... and then the question "When was this?"
Trust me, I know... I know how you feel when you hug someone you care about and haven't met in ages and you see their eyes light up; Everything is okay till you light that cigarette and laugh as reminiscing and the only thing they have to say is "Dude, that's funny... but I really don't remember..."
And you smile and say "Yeah dude... It's cool, don't worry bout it." And surprised as you may be at how you feel, the truth is that it breaks your heart. It destroys something inside... and you walk away confused... You wonder whether anything you ever shared with them means anything at all.
But you know what? That light in their eyes shines for you and you alone. They may have forgotten your words, but you still mean as much as you did, if not more. So never think they care less because they forgot your birthday, exam or even New Year's eve... coz it's still going to be the same voice at the end of the line... and the light is still gonna shine... Even if they can't remember what put it there in the first place....
I know what it's like when you talk about memories in that rare happy voice and have silence on the other end from your partner in crime... and then the question "When was this?"
Trust me, I know... I know how you feel when you hug someone you care about and haven't met in ages and you see their eyes light up; Everything is okay till you light that cigarette and laugh as reminiscing and the only thing they have to say is "Dude, that's funny... but I really don't remember..."
And you smile and say "Yeah dude... It's cool, don't worry bout it." And surprised as you may be at how you feel, the truth is that it breaks your heart. It destroys something inside... and you walk away confused... You wonder whether anything you ever shared with them means anything at all.
But you know what? That light in their eyes shines for you and you alone. They may have forgotten your words, but you still mean as much as you did, if not more. So never think they care less because they forgot your birthday, exam or even New Year's eve... coz it's still going to be the same voice at the end of the line... and the light is still gonna shine... Even if they can't remember what put it there in the first place....
Thursday, January 15, 2009
The Wait
I wait in the darkness
And I wait in the rain
I left once before
But never again
I wait as the sun sets
and I'll be here as it will rise
I wait with the roots
and look up to the skies
I wait in the darkness
I wait in the rain
I wait for your return
and I wait for the pain
And I wait in the rain
I left once before
But never again
I wait as the sun sets
and I'll be here as it will rise
I wait with the roots
and look up to the skies
I wait in the darkness
I wait in the rain
I wait for your return
and I wait for the pain
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Just another post
"I have to admit that things are getting better."
Well, maybe it's all just a matter of perspective and so on, but it's how things seem to be that's important, right? More than what they are really like. I mean, what are they really like? I dunno. Doesn't that depend on what's important to you too?
I was writing in my diary today. I've written in it twice this trimester. Weird, considering there was a point of time in my life where I used to write in that book at least once a day... Well, joblessness may have increased, but so have ways to alleviate it.
Anyhow, tomorrow is my Fly exam. And I am really really REALLY bored. Was sitting on the roof and talking to Miss Sunshine. It's funny. Realized that we've lived together for almost two years now, and there is still so much about each other that we don't know. I guess it's a good thing. And yeah, there are eighteen years to catch up on, so I don't think we shall be running out of rooftop conversation material anytime soon.
It's almost time to go home, another trimester has ended. At this rate, I think 3 more years in this place will just fly by. What then? Err... I'd rather not think about that.
Anyway, this trimester has been ... ummm... well, can't think of a better word to describe it than the overused 'random', but that's exactly what it has been! IN terms of events, relationships, revelations and general incidents. And I guess what Miss Sunshine said may be right... The last trimester was pretty messed up coz it wasn't random enough. or maybe (once again), it is just changed perception.
I think I've grown up more in this trimester than I have since I came to Law School. Or maybe it's just been a culmination of the last 18 months. Either way, I'm glad. I have not exactly re-prioritized, but you could say I've learnt to "chill the fuck out".
"Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns..."
Learnt the leson Mr. Acosta. Learnt it quite well.
Anyhow, I shall return to Adoption and Maintenance. This has been a rambly last-few-days-of-the-trimester sort of post. Which kinda is what it is... Errr... I should just stop typing now.
-_-
^_^
----------------
Now playing: Pink Floyd - High Hopes
via FoxyTunes
Well, maybe it's all just a matter of perspective and so on, but it's how things seem to be that's important, right? More than what they are really like. I mean, what are they really like? I dunno. Doesn't that depend on what's important to you too?
I was writing in my diary today. I've written in it twice this trimester. Weird, considering there was a point of time in my life where I used to write in that book at least once a day... Well, joblessness may have increased, but so have ways to alleviate it.
Anyhow, tomorrow is my Fly exam. And I am really really REALLY bored. Was sitting on the roof and talking to Miss Sunshine. It's funny. Realized that we've lived together for almost two years now, and there is still so much about each other that we don't know. I guess it's a good thing. And yeah, there are eighteen years to catch up on, so I don't think we shall be running out of rooftop conversation material anytime soon.
It's almost time to go home, another trimester has ended. At this rate, I think 3 more years in this place will just fly by. What then? Err... I'd rather not think about that.
Anyway, this trimester has been ... ummm... well, can't think of a better word to describe it than the overused 'random', but that's exactly what it has been! IN terms of events, relationships, revelations and general incidents. And I guess what Miss Sunshine said may be right... The last trimester was pretty messed up coz it wasn't random enough. or maybe (once again), it is just changed perception.
I think I've grown up more in this trimester than I have since I came to Law School. Or maybe it's just been a culmination of the last 18 months. Either way, I'm glad. I have not exactly re-prioritized, but you could say I've learnt to "chill the fuck out".
"Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns..."
Learnt the leson Mr. Acosta. Learnt it quite well.
Anyhow, I shall return to Adoption and Maintenance. This has been a rambly last-few-days-of-the-trimester sort of post. Which kinda is what it is... Errr... I should just stop typing now.
-_-
^_^
----------------
Now playing: Pink Floyd - High Hopes
via FoxyTunes
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)