Sunday, February 15, 2009

The Queen in School

Speaking of dreams. I should write mine down before I forget.

Okay, the sequence of events is completely jumbled. I shall just write what I remember.

The whole thing was set in near future. I was in NLS, but the building structure was that of school (K). Also, there was some kind of fest going on and the current event was some tennis tournament and a volleyball match.
  • A Queen in a church like huge hall/room. I was sitting on the last bench. There was a guard who worked only two days a week. She was giving me some kind of cryptic advice right before I left for some ball.
  • There was some NLS party like thing where the school canteen now stands. The lights were magenta and I was with Lillin, Anglicized Aurangzeb and someone else (can't remember). There was something important that we had to discuss but were pretending we were just dancing because someone was spying on us.
  • Boxer chick (:P Don't kill me) and Gaadi boy were running around trying to find out where the tennis match was being held.
  • It was Christmas for a little while. Then I think it became Valentine's day. Or the other way around.

Don't you Cry, It's Only a Dream

I've heard this song somewhere...

I mean, I know I've heard it lots of times... but I've heard it somewhere recently... and it was a sad time. But I can't remember...

Can't remember...

I seem to be unable to remember a lot of things these days. Sometimes I know it's positively, terribly important that I remember and I think for hours and hours. Once in a while, I remember, and the feeling is amazing... but more often than not, I have no idea what memory it is that I'm trying so hard to recall.

So, tonight I'm going to wonder where I've last heard this song. Maybe a pub? A car? Someone's house? Maybe it will come to me in a dream. Though I honestly don't know how that is any better.

It's funny. When you wake up, you remember everything from your dream for a few moments... and then it's only traces of the feeling that remain with you while your entire dream fades away. Well, Life is only a dream, right?

Yeah...
Only a dream...



----------------
Now playing: Guns N' Roses - Don't Cry (Original)
via FoxyTunes

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day. Bleh.

The Perfect Guy




TAKE THIS SURVEY!


Section 1

Hair color?
Black

Eye color?
Black/brown/gray

Height?
Around 6 feet

Six pack?
Yes please *laughs*

Long hair or short?
Short and messy

Glasses?
Doesn't matter

Piercings?
Bonus

Eyebrows?
-

Buff or skinny?
Skinny

Teeth?
-

Section 2

Funny or serious?
A nice blend

Party-hopper or more stay-at-home?
Party at home?

Should he be able to bake or cook?
Both

Does he have a best friend?
Yes

Is it okay for him to have a lot of female friends?
It's okay, but I'd prefer it if his guy friends were way more in number. Don't know why.

Out-going or shy?
A combination

Sarcastic or sincere?
Sincerely sarcastic... haha.

Does he love his mother?
I suppose so. Doesn't matter.

Should he watch chick-flicks?
Only if he has nothing else to do.

Would he be a smoker?
Probably. Actually, yes.

How about drinking?
Yeah

And swearing?
Irrelevant

Would he play with your hair?
I dunno

Would he have more than one girlfriend at a time?
NO

Would he pay for you when you're on a date?
No

Does he kiss on the first date?
No

Where would you go for dinner?
Somewhere with nice music

Would he buy you flowers?
Once a year at the most

Would he lay under the stars with you and spout random philosophies?
*sigh* yes?

Would he write poetry about you?
Songs would be cooler

Would he use endearments?
Probably

Would he hang out with your and YOUR friends?
Once in a while, even though he wouldn't like it very much

How about you hanging out with him and HIS friends?
Once in a while

Would he walk you up to the door at the end of the evening?
Yes

Would you hold hands?
Not too often

Section 3

Does he play soccer?
Yes

Baseball?
Irrelevant

Football?
Irrelevant

Basketball?
Often

Water polo?
Irrelevant

Golf or something equally boring?
Irrelevant

Does he surf?
That would be cool

Skateboard?
Bonus!!!

Snowboard?
Irrelevant

Can he sing?
Yes

Play the guitar?
Yes. Definitely.

Play piano?
Hmmm...

Play the drums?
Yes

Can he keep his room clean?
Lol, doesn't matter

Is he an artist of sorts?
Yeah...

Does he write his own music?
Once in a while... and it's great

Does he have pets?
He loves them

Section 4

Does he use the word dude?
Yeah

How about tight?
Only to describe music

Would he watch the sun rise and set with you?
If we're awake, why not?

What kind of car does he drive?
One that he loves

How old is he?
About a couple of years older than me

What's his name?
*sigh* I wish I knew...

CLICK HERE TO TAKE THIS SURVEY!
MySpace Surveys

Love and Drugs


Love

Valentine's day

Where's my gun?

I need to go

Away



Drugs

Awful things

Infiltrate your mind

Make everything else irrelevant

Pass?


Monday, February 9, 2009

A post

I was just floating by - aimlessly, as usual - when I realized that it's been quite a while since I have actually posted anything that makes sense. Well, tangible sense anyhow. That is, if sense can be tangible in the first place... But that's an entirely different debate.

I just finished some Vanilla ice cream. And by finished, I don't just mean finished eating, I mean finished the box. As in totaled it. Or however, the cool kids say it these days. (Darn it, I feel old.) My brother will kill me tomorrow, but for now, I'll just drink some more of this sickeningly sweet strawberry syrup.

But it is red. And suddenly, I feel a little sick. I think I'm done with red syrups for a while now.

The holidays have been... interesting. In a very boring mundane way. But unfortunately, they haven't been mundane enough to be comfortable. Because, lets face it, why else do people live in any kind of monotony? It's just comfort, security and safety (Yuck, I sound like an advertisement)... and the little annoying bumps in the road have made sure that I don't achieve that stability. So, I'm left feeling like a top that someone didn't crank all the way around. (Is that even how it's said?) I'm not strung enough to spin, nor am I standing still. I'm just wobbling around waiting to crash into one of those dining table legs.

Bam.

Internship is pretty sucky. Sucky because there's no real work, and the timings are a pain. By the time I get home, I want nothing but lots of water and silence - which of course is impossible. (The latter, not the former... on good days {This story shall someday have it's own post}) Hence I get cranky and irritable. The perfect seasoning.

Sigh.

A month is all that's left. Here is where I start my "But I don't really wanna go back." Well, you know what? Screw it. I DO want to go back. If for nothing else, then for the sake of smoking my cigarettes without constantly looking over my shoulder. And of course, the 24 hour internet. And the weather. And Pecos. And the terrace.

Not to say I don't like it here. I do. I love watching endless episodes of anime and pointlessly listening to music. But it costs. And I've realized I can spend those 'resources' better. Not to mention my internship has effectively killed my holiday.

*grumbles*
Stupid lawyers.
Grrr.

Anyhow, tomorrow is another working day. heh. I wonder whatever will happen if I fail to show up. Suddenly I have visions of myself cutting work and careening through the city with a laugh and a half. And then I see myself returning home, and my ship sinks.

Blug blug blug.
*grins*
I'm sure a ship could sink like that!

Damn it. All this logical typing has made me hungry. Well, not really, but I do need an excuse to eat those chips.
Should I?
Should I not?
Ah, the illusion of choice in a sea of fate.
Such is the cruel nature of this world.

Do thou not love me Princess?

Aaaaaaaaaah.
Focus.
Focus.
Logical sentences.

It isn't really my fault you know. It's just that I've realized it's so much more fun if you write as you think. Sometimes, you even discover things that you just never knew. Inside your own head!!! Though I am surprised that I am surprised. At the above fact that is, not the said discoveries.

Anyway, I am losing track and I already don't remember what I started this post with. it's time to go. Thin, crisp slices of packaged, deep fried potatoes await.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Even if...

It's all hooded eyes and taunting laughs
Subtract the cruelty, but keep the cold rain
And we shiver in the darkness
oh, looks like we forgot the lights again
and the sun's long gone

Half forgotten promises
and letters that will remain unsent
Scattered around the past
Living a life that seems to be on rent
and we laugh

Say my name again
and lets close our first two eyes
Blind ourselves to the dark
and all the silly pointless lies
that keep us safe

Like the cold
because it remembers to preserve
Remembers, unlike us, who live to forget
And so, each other we deserve
Hold my hand

It isn't love
And it isn't saying I'll always care
It's just all I can do
You know I'll always be there
Even if...

Even if it is just because there is nowhere else to go...

Untitled


On some days
I think I should call out
But instead I just look out again
and watch the sea tease the shore
and I can only whisper to myself "Not anymore"
Not anymore
Not anymore...
Just loud enough for myself, not anymore

But,
Every single time the water returns
Only I can feel the relief
And every time it laughs away
Only I can hear the grief

I would ask you to come back to me
Love, I would ask you to return
But I don't ever call
Because you can't leave
if you were never here at all
Never here at all
never here at all
No, you can't leave if you were never here at all

And so
I only watch you go
screaming in the language of the dead
I want you to understand me
But I refuse to repeat what I said

One day things will change my dear
Some day the earth and the sea shall not meet
Perhaps because the sea forgot to return
or maybe the Earth chose to freeze
But I refuse to watch you burn
Watch you burn
Watch you burn...
I apologize, but I refuse to watch you burn...